Cruzan Musings

My friend, Tamara, is from Cincinnati, but she wants to get married in St. Croix. Whenever people mention St. Croix, I say I grew up there, although not in the way people imagine when they hear that phrase. But still, it is true. My first real memories of family vacations are of winter breaks at the Buccaneer resort. I definitely have a treasure trove of memories from that place, beginning with the concrete classical statues posed outside the guest rooms, which our parents told us were our babysitters.

I learned to play golf and tennis at the Buccaneer, from great pros. I learned backgammon, at age 8, from some professional gamblers, Barbara Jean and Tunky, of Las Vegas, whom I met at the bar. I discovered the Beatles there, too, at age 9, along with limbo and crab racing. I also learned the importance of high SPF sunblock, and to go inside when a red rash would appear on my hands late in the morning, and to wait until the sun was not so strong before going back outside.

As the years went by, and my family returned again and again, I also discovered Haitian art, Rastafarians, reggae, emeralds, Marimekko, batik, barracudas, jelly fish and fire coral (and also the idea that when you get back into the boat, it's helpful to pour whiskey on the wounds from these), as well as marijuana, fresh coconut milk, kahlua and rum.

My family visited probably three or four times before my parents decided to buy a condo on St Croix, after which we would still visit the Buccaneer to eat lunch and then digest it on the beach. I'm not sure exactly when I started drinking alcohol, but I know it happened on St. Croix and involved a lot of fruit juices. Bloody Mary at brunch, Pina Colada by the pool, Banana Daquiri as you came off the eighteenth hole, Planter's Punch and Calypso Daquiris at dinner - we drank all day long and I know that is why I gained five pounds every time I spent a week there. Surely it wasn't just the key lime pie or the danish butter spread on fresh corn bread before dinner.

Once we had the condo, I was part of the Island community, not just a tourist. I learned that some people dropped out of the rat race to sell stuff in St. Croix, and that growing very fat and wearing only muumuus every day was also an option, and that my parents disapproved deeply of both these choices. I found myself in St. Croix twice each winter between the ages of 12 and 16. During college, I went a few more times. During Spring Break, freshman year, my father chaperoned me and my estranged roommate, Yoon-Sun, with whom I gave a classical piano and violin recital at the legendary local night club, Club One North. Once, just once, my ex-husband and I vacationed there with my parents and six month old baby, Max, who marked the occasion with his first swim in the condo pool, his first dip in the Caribbean, his first steel drum concert, and his first solid food - melon, papaya, guava.

Soon after, following my divorce, my parents told me to use the condo whenever Max's father took him away from me for a week, and so it was that I came to have my post divorce fling with the bartender at our condo's restaurant. When I first met my husband, Paul, I brought him to St. Croix with me. We lit Hannukah candles every evening and my presents to us were a horse back ride through the rainforest, snorkeling at the reef, and all sorts of wonderful Cruzan adventures. Paul was a good sport each night while I played violin and sang with a number of local and visiting bands in and around Christiansted, and seemed to enjoy getting comped drinks and meals and meeting my fans. We made love together for the first time in St. Croix, after sharing breakfast on the patio and a swim in the sea.

Paul and I returned to St. Croix one year later, during our engagement, and though I brought my violin, I don't think I played or sang with any bands; I just wanted to be with Paul. We played tennis, drank tequila, ate sashimi, sailed on a catamaran at sunset, shot pool, and bought Haitian art for ourselves and the members of our wedding party.

I wanted us to have our wedding in St. Croix because of our history there, and also because I love how my hair responds to the humid Caribbean sea air, turning all wavy and wild, but I let my parents talk me out of it. Over the course of the next three years, we added two more babies to our family. We were supposed to have met my parents in St. Croix with Max and one year old baby Sam, but then the planes hit the Twin Towers and Delta rerouted our flights through Atlanta and San Juan and we cancelled our trip.

A couple of years later, I broke up with my parents. I remember that while my sister was on the outs with them for three and half years, they told me DO NOT GIVE THE CONDO KEY TO YOUR SISTER! I still have my key, but I'm sure they have changed the locks, and I will probably never see the island again. It is far too time consuming and expensive to get our family there from Ohio, but it will certainly always hold a very special place in my heart.

My friend Tamara is a graduate student, as is her fiance. They have entered a dream wedding contest sponsored by Crate and Barrel which prize would enable them to marry memorably and in style at the Buccaneer without incurring the awful debt. If they do win, and they take my family along for the celebration, maybe Paul and I will renew our vows while we are down there. To help make this happen, you can vote for Tamara and her fiance, Jason, at ultimateweddingcontest.com/entries/21954. The couples with the most votes will then enter a judging round. If they get that far, I believe they will win. Please help them to have that chance.