the inspiring people in my life

I told a friend today that I haven't blogged recently because my life is so consumed with matters that primarily concern other people, and I don't believe that it's my business to share other people's stuff on my blog. But perhaps I can share what I am observing in the people around me, and how it affects me.

Generally, I have observed lately that living life fully takes a constant summoning of courage. Sometimes this may appear to be fearlessness, and in some cases, as with my twenty-year-old opera conducting friend this summer, it may be just that. In most cases, though, I think what we perceive as fearlessness is the seemingly effortless summoning of courage by someone who has become more expert in it than others. Often this is someone who has experienced what happens when you let everything you thought life was supposed to be fall and shatter and then, when you pick up the pieces and rearrange them, find something more beautiful there than what you had before.

My sister and many of my friends are doing this lately in a variety of ways. I am grateful that I find it very inspiring to witness and even support and encourage them as they transition from married to single again, from homeless to nesting, from employed to unemployed and back again, from divorced to happily remarried or happily independent, and from employed and miserable to pursuing their heart's desire in graduate school. They are reclaiming integrity and hope, they are aiming higher this time, with greater optimism and wisdom, with increased strength and level-headedness and faith in themselves.

Soon, if Drake is actually dissolved by the as-yet-unnamed entity that may purchase it and Paul's current workplace actually ceases to exist, we may be rearranging shattered bits of life expectation in our house as well. But, as I said to Paul the other night, the only constant in life is change. What we can decide, what we have control over, is how we embrace, resist or confront it.

Paul and I are living a very blessed life together and we know it. As I recently pointed out to him, we have each already survived two huge and traumatic transitions, essentially on our own: first, our own birth and twenty some-odd years later, moving to Cincinnati. Oh, yes, and I almost forgot, there was also my divorce, hundreds of miles away from friends and family. But since 1999, we have faced change together as a team, and none of it - including the births of our children, surgeries, the deaths of loved ones, giving up a business to relocate for a fellowship, spending a year tied up in litigation - none of it has been quite so traumatic as those earlier changes we faced without each other. I have to believe that our combined spirit and energy will make each future transition easier for us to navigate.

Meanwhile, thanks to all you everyday heroes for continuing to inspire me and for showing me how it's done.